Thank you for Being You

As a new Mom, I spend a lot of time reviewing what my goals as a parent are- loving my children wholly and teaching them how to love honestly and fully are among the top priorities- but as of late I have begun to examine those ideals in a brighter light. I want to help develop my child's brain, my child's body and my child's spirit as best as I can in these years of formation, to lead her in to a life of well living, and of course I wish the same for our second child... but what remains of parenting once they are no longer children, but adults, forming their own family and legacy? The love never vanishes- but what becomes that number one priority as the deep challenges in life commence and seldom cease?  


Too many parents try to make their children in to something from the moment they meet them- and I find it a horrible shame. I know a lot of grown adults who grew up with parents who meant very well, but smothered who their children were in the process- and this left them a bit lost as adults, or bitter and on a tyraid. A lot of my friends asked me if I would enroll Gwen in piano or violin lessons as soon as she was old enough. Other people asked Tristan if he would press her toward going in to a magnet school for art... it is an easy thing to fall in to, as you want your child to be well rounded and you want them to be knowledgeable, but in the end the motivation makes all the difference. Of course I'll have her in every music lesson imaginable- but only is she wants to. Art classes by the dozens? Absolutely- if she loves it naturally... Would I be delighted if Gwen became a killer musician- or my baby on the way? Would both Tristan and I swell with pride if one or both of them took up any of the arts? Yes, of course we would. But should they be wonderful athletes without a care in the world for the tune of a 16th century song, or a rattling guitar riff, I will not lament that. I will be just as proud. It is not my delight in what they excel in that is important when it comes to the life of my child- it is only that they excel in something and live out of it! I did/will birth them, but I only had a slight hand in their true creation- a greater magic in the hands of God is the force that put them in to being what they are, as they are. 


My delight in them should be in the importance of their being- no matter what their passions or purpose may be or not be. I hope to never fail them there. 


Perhaps the most imperative thing we can do for our children as they age and become fully developed human beings is to teach them how to know themselves, actively listen to themselves, trust themselves and how to delve in to their talents and their loves in life. Imagine if the great musicians did not become musicians at all, or the most awesome scientists abandoned their intellects for a career offering something else. Our imprints as mother's and father's are enormous, but before those babies are even born, they are indeed little, unique, beautiful people all their own. No two of us are the same! I am so thankful for that. 


A question- are you in touch with the importance of your being?